Getting Married in Japan part 2 - Long ass wait at City Hall (but we're married at last!)

 Following from my previous post about marriage in Japan, we just got back from city hall, and we are officially married now.

Arriving at city hall in the morning, we had to wait around for a ridiculously long time before we were able to speak with someone. We were initially concerned that we wouldn't be able to register our marriage due to missing some document, or some incorrect information. Experiences with anything bureaucratic in Japan have shown that there is no room for mistakes. So imagine our surprise when we were told we had to make a bunch of corrections. Fortunately, we weren't sent away, and they were fine with us making the corrections right there and then, especially with some of my translated documents. Some was due to the technical terms in Japanese, others were lack of consistency of my parents' names in katakana (I didn't realize I spelt them differently until they pointed it out to me.  
We were hoping to keep a copy of the marriage registration form, considering we took the the time to pick out a design. As we would not see those documents again, we opted to go to a nearby convenience store and photocopy them as backups for ourselves. While we were out, we went to the nearby bakery for some lunch to celebrate (early) our marriage. 

After returning to city hall, we did some more waiting, and everything seemed to be processed without problems. The only one obstacle was regarding who was going to be the head of the household (or 世帯主 / setainushi). We hadn't really thought it about too much, and until now, we put my wife as the head of the household, because the apartment, and utilities are under her name. While the staff said that we could change it later on, they gave us something to think about, as apparently depending on who is listed as head of the household, we'd be paying less tax. The staff said it is an unusual situation for the wife to be the head of the family, though I'm guessing the city I am currently in doesn't get a lot of foreigners going to register their marriage. In any case, not long after that we finally got our certificate of marriage. I will admit though, compared to some of the certificates I have seen online of other cities (Osaka's for one), this city's certificate of marriage design is rather... underwhelming. Very bureaucratic in design, nothing fancy at all, which was a bit of a letdown, but we are finally married and that's all that matters at this point. 

As mentioned before, the wedding itself is still a ways off, though we have decided to hire the services of a wedding planner to help when we realized that there are a lot of things that need to be done, and with both of us working full time, it was too difficult for us to do, even if we're aiming for a small wedding. 

Living together in a new apartment

 久しぶりだね。

Yeah, it's been about two months since my last post, and I have been busy.

I was planning to do post about renting apartments in Japan, but before I knew it, my fiance and I have moved into our new apartment. Perhaps I will do that post another time.

Having lived in LeoPalace apartments for most of my time here in Japan, it's hard to describe what it's like to be able to cook in a decent sized kitchen. It also feels weird sleeping in a separate bedroom.

Rent is actually cheaper than my last apartment, considering we are splitting the rent. Even if it was just one of us, it is only a little bit more expensive than the previous apt, but there's just way more space. Even better is that internet is free. It's a basic plan, but given that neither of us plays games online or uploads videos constantly, it's just fine.

In terms of location, it's a little further away from the train station, but still near. But the best thing about the area is there is a lot going on. Plenty of restaurants, shops and even a mall nearby. City hall is within a reasonable walking distance, but because it's closed on weekends, there is fortunately the citizen's service centre. I went there last weekend to give my notice of moving in to the city. Luckily, there was hardly anyone there, so my registration and residence card were processed within the hour. In addition, my regular gym is near the station, which is much more convenient than taking the train every time I wanted to go. While it is a smaller branch, it has just about everything I need for training, though I still think the one in Tsurugashima is the best one I've used so far.

However, moving together with my fiance also brought some problems to light: I have way too many Gunpla for my own damn good - I didn't realize I had another two boxes that I never bothered to open after moving to Saitama 3 years ago. At my fiance's suggestion, I've sorted through what kits I will keep, what I will send back home, and what kits I will sell. Deciding what ones to send back and sell was actually surprisingly easy. It's what I wanted to keep that was the most difficult. To make it easier for me, aside from one kit, the rest are all kits that I haven't built yet. They are also kits I want to customise in some form or another, and they are kits that I have really wanted to build for some time.

I also have some Transformers figures that I sorted through, both official and third party. I decided to keep two of my Iron factory figures. Sadly I will be sending City Commander/Ultra Magnus back to Australia. The ones I want to keep will be Miko the Hunter/Windblade and Rush beats/Jazz. Possible review idea in the future? I still Rushbeats represents the best legends Transformers figures Iron Factory produced at that time. I'll get in to a rant about that once I get around to reviewing it.

We are still adjusting to our new home and new life. But in any case, we can now finally focus our attention on getting married.

Getting Married in Japan part 1 - Japanese Bureaucracy

Having become engaged last year, my fiancé and I are wading through the wonderful world of Japanese bureaucracy in getting our marriage registered. Being a foreigner, there are a few extra steps on my end that I have to take before getting married to a Japanese national. So I though I would chronicle my experiences so far. 

The ultimate goal is to go to our local city hall to register our mariage. One of the documents I needed was a Certificate of Non Impediment to marriage (CNI) from my country's embassy. The name of this document will vary from country to country, but basically it is a document that states that there is nothing legally preventing me from getting married (of legal age, not being forced to get married etc.). Filling out the application for the CNI is straight forward enough aside from getting someone to witness my signature and sign the document also to prove they witnessed it. Only certain people can be a witness, and being outside my home country, that significantly reduces the pool of eligible people: Either my embassy can be a witness at no extra charge - but I need to make an appointment on a weekday (and take time off from work) to go to the rich part of Tokyo to submit my application; or if I want to submit it via post, I would need to go to a notary office for a fee (about 11,000 yen) for a witness. 

The thing is, I had planned to submit it via mail, but despite my best efforts explaining to the various notary offices I called, they apparently can't witness and sign my document because it is a government document. At best, they apparently could only produce a certificate to say that my form is a genuine original. I spoke to my embassy who suggested finding another notary office to do it, but the notary office I spoke to in Ikebukuro said that the result would be the same no matter which office I went to. Eventually, I did end up going to the embassy and saved myself the frustration of dealing with the notary office. Somebody is not telling the truth, or something has changed regarding the notary office being a witness. 

The next step is to go to the local city hall to submit our marriage registration form. However, my fiancé and I encountered some issues that required us to speak with someone at city hall on what to do. Since the marriage registration form is all in Japanese, with the assumption that a Japanese couple is to get married, we had to confirm how I would be writing my name in the application (either in English, or in Katakana), along with the format of my name due to me having a middle name - usually one would write their family name, followed by a comma and then first name, but we weren't sure if a comma was needed between my first and middle names to (answer: It isn't). In addition, I needed to confirm what other documents were needed on top of the marriage registration form. Besides my CNI, I also needed to bring my passport, as well as my original birth certificate, along with translations for all three of those documents. We were a little worried if city hall was going to be picky about who could translate my documents, but fortunately, the city hall staff told us that anybody can translate - even myself if I wanted. Also, the requirements seem to vary from city to city, as I have read that not all city offices require birth certificates, and others require certificate of residence (住民票/juminhyou)- which my city does not require luckily.

I know it seems rather pedantic to be confirming about things such as writing format or style, but any foreigner who has had to deal with any kind of Japanese bureaucracy will know that there is no room for mistakes when it comes to these sort of things. If you are missing even just one document, no matter how minor of importance it is, they will not process you and send you away. Better to ask stupid questions now and get it correct the first time, rather than having to find out you got it wrong and have to go through it all again later.

As for my original birth certificate, after reading a while ago about how some cities require it, I asked mum to send my birth certificate to me. Funnily enough, according to her, the post office told her that it is apparently illegal to mail birth certificates, much to the post office staff's surprise too. The staff member was all too happy to bend the rules and classify the contents of the envelope as simply "documents" and sent it to me express. Fortunately, the document arrived safetly. While it is apparently illegal for the commonfolk to send birth certificates, my state government has a service to mail birth certificates overseas - for a significant fee (fuck you Australian Government).

So as of right now, minus the translations, I just about have all my documents ready. Besides getting the translations ready, we also need two witnesses for our marriage registration form. Unlike applying for my CNI, anybody can be a witness, and they don't need to witness the signature itself supposedly. We have asked a friend of ours who I used to work with during my ALT days and still keep in touch with, and my future mother-in-law in Kagawa. My fiance will be mailing the form to her shortly to sign, before we go to city hall to register our marriage.

As for the wedding ceremony itself, we decided on some time later this year, but this is not set in stone yet. But whatever date we set, I do understand that will come with its own share of stress too, especially because some members of my family naturally want to attend the wedding.

２０２４年の反省 - Reflecting on 2024

With 2024 coming to a close in a few hours (at least here in Japan), I thought I would take the time for a bit of 反省 (hansei/self reflection) on this year. Compared to previous years, a lot of big things have happened for me this year - both good and bad. 

So below are my highlights for 2024, with links pointing to the relevant posts.

I was hospitalized for the first time in Japan.

As a result of a bad diet, I was admitted to hospital for a little over a week. Compared to my experiences with ambulance crew when I had the CCP virus, the nurses at the hospital were actually rather friendly and kind. 

This experience was also a wakeup call to make significant changes to my diet. I'm trying to cook more often, and avoiding a lot of oily food, especially deep-fried food. So no more karaage, or curry and rice. Hell, I haven't had McDonald's or even Mos Burger since then.

I got engaged.

Yeah, after 10 years, my girlfriend (now fiancée) and I finally got engaged, and we are going through the process of getting officially married before having the wedding ceremony. Furthermore, we are looking to move to a new apartment so that we can officially live together.

I visited the future mother-in-law.

Earlier this month, I travelled to Kagawa prefecture. While my fiancée had some other business to do here, it was an opportunity to do a bit of sightseeing in a part of Japan that I have never been to before. However, the main purpose was to visit my fiancée's mother for the very first time in all the years that we had been dating. Her mother was happy and approved of me (even though I had proposed before that), and my fiancée gave her approval of my performance when meeting her mother for dinner.

I went overseas this year.

I travelled overseas for the first time in 5 years. While I didn't go back home to Australia, I did go to the Philippines to see mum and the rest of my mum's side of the family. It's been nearly 20 years since I went to the Philippines, and it's also the first time to go to the Philippines without Dad since he passed away. 

So what will 2025 bring? Hopefully more good news than bad. In any case with just under 3 hours left here in Japan as of this post, よいお年を/Have a happy new year!

A short trip to Udon-land aka Sanuki aka Kagawa prefecture

So I got back from Kagawa prefecture earlier today, and thought I would share my experiences of my short trip there. As mentioned previously, the main purpose was to visit my future mother-in-law(義母). It did not set in until a few hours before when my fiancee started coaching/drilling on what things I should and shouldn't talk about. Fortunately, despite initial nervousness, the dinner/meeting went well. I can confirm with certainty as my fiancee gave her official seal of approval on my performance for the evening. We also gave her some おみやげ that we purchased in Ikebukuro, including cakes and せんべい (crackers). She in turn gave us an engagement gift of a rather generous amount of money that we (reluctantly) accepted, though we reached a compromise in that we would set the money aside the next time she will visit us in Tokyo, or for emergencies.

Aside from meeting 未来の義母, I also did some sightseeing, though time only permitted for two places to visit.
The first place I went to was Ogijima (男木島). As the name suggests, it is an island that requires taking a ferry from Takamatsu. Fortunately the ferry trip only takes about 40 minutes one way. The first thing I noticed upon arriving was how quiet it was. Ogijima is a very very small island, with less than 200 residents, though there is apparently a school here. All the houses are located close to the ferry port. I spent some time taking in the views, and stopped at a small bakery for a muffin and coffee. After, I followed the trail and headed to the island's main attraction, the lighthouse. Aside from 2 or 3 other tourists, I did not encounter anybody else along the trail. As I got closer to the lighthouse, the wind got stronger, and there weren't any trees to protect from the wind. I spent a bit of time admiring the view, and the made my way back, but not before stopping at another cafe for some tea and pumpkin icecream... served inside an actual pumpkin, though you are told to not eat the actual pumpkin. Aside from myself, there was a group of 3 elderly people that were seemingly residents, based on where they were going afterwards (I left shortly after they did, on my way to the ferry).

Ogijima has very narrow roads, not even big enough for cars

You can get some really nice views overlooking nearby islands

Ogijima's lighthouse, but there's not much here to protect from the strong winds

The other place I went to was Ritsurin Koen (栗林公園). It is a big park, and we didn't get the chance to explore it all. It kind of reminded me of the park in Okayama I visited last year, though you also have a nice close up view of Mt. Shiun (紫雲山) to go with the nice scenic photos you can take. Fortunately, there weren't many people at the time, but there was also a light up event happening later in the evening, and my fiancee and I suspected this was the reason for fewer visitors. Even so, it certainly is quite a sight to see, even during the day. It's location is also rather convenient in that there are bus stops surrounding the park, and the train station is nearby too.

Lots of bonsai trees in to see

Mt. Shiun is smack bang in front of Ritsurin Koen

Interestingly, Kagawa is the smallest prefecture in all of Japan. It is also one of the more quiet places in the country, but certainly not as quiet as some places I have travelled to. There definitely is not much to do around here, but if you are looking for a change of pace away from your Tokyos, Osakas and Kyotos, Kagawa prefecture is certainly a place to check out. Though if you do like your udon, then it would be a good opportunity to check out what is described as being the origin of Sanuki udon. Funnily enough, Kagawa used to be called Sanuki before its name change. 

義母会いに行く

Soon we will be visiting my future mother-in-law. This will actually be the very first time that I have ever met my fiance's mother in all the years that we have been together. This is despite her having met my mother a few times already, and she was able to meet my father when she visited me in Australia shortly before moved to Japan to work.

I won't go into the details, but distance and schedule were two of the reasons that I have not met her until now. She seemed shy about the idea of video calling in the past, so I have never had a video call with her either. However, I did have the chance to speak with her briefly on the phone, and she gave off a good first impression. Also due to her background, she has given advice for medical related matters, especially with my brief period in the hospital earlier this year.

Furthermore, while my work has taken me across many parts of Japan, this will be the first time to travel to Kagawa. From what my fiance has told me, her hometown is pretty rural, and while there are buses and trains, a car is recommended to get around quickly. I have also been told that udon is a local specialty, and compared to other areas in the Japan, udon in Kagawa is pretty damn cheap. I am still having a look in to Kagawa prefecture and what there is to do there, so I would like to a do little bit of sightseeing as well if there is time for it.

婚約した

１０年間のデートして、ようやく彼女と婚約した。

...　いいえ、これから彼女と言えないでしょう。婚約者というだ。